Each and every one of us loves our animals and wishes they could stay with us our entire lifetime. Unfortunately we know that doesn’t happen, and we will experience the loss of one or more of our much loved and adored animal family members within this time. It is hard to describe the devastation we feel in our hearts and the unsurmountable loss from which we need to recover. Some say it is easier to lose a human family member or friend than one of our animals. Perhaps this is because our animals are with us each and every day the moment they enter our home and become one of the family until the day they leave the earth plane. Perhaps it is the incredible unconditional love they give to us each and everyday of their lives, that is so hard to live without.
I come across this time and time again when people have lost their animal loved ones and find it so difficult to cope with that loss. They come to me, to connect with their adored companion not only to make sense of the situation but also for a heartfelt message from the other side. This week a beautiful girl named Charlotte, an angelic white persian passed away and her mum Kelly was heartbroken. This is her story, make sure you have tissues handy.
What Kelly has to say about the consultation
I truly enjoyed hearing Charlottes words. Very comforting and has made me think about how much she knew about me that I was unaware of.
She’s been able to communicate with Trisha in such a way, it’s hard to not believe in the afterlife soul. Charlottes presence is here with me and I’m now learning how to be more aware of it. I think Trisha is the missing link between life of the grieving and the afterlife of our pets. My biggest fear was that Charlotte was somewhere looking for me, thinking I’ve abandoned her or worse, gave up on her in the end. I now know Charlotte understood everything far beyond what I could have ever imagined.
I will be seeking Trisha’s help again soon, in regards to my other Cat Possum.
Thank you Trish. You’ve helped so much – even though my still hurts ( little less) and it’s been 1 month 1 week and I still cry ( little less) every day. At least I have someone I can call if I need to hear from Charlotte….
Kelly’s Story about Charlotte
Trisha I’m heart broken.
5 years ago I picked a little white Persian cat from a litter. Actually, she chose us. She was the runt of the litter. Little tiny fluffy beautiful fuzz ball, with blue eyes and pink accents. Over the next few weeks I couldn’t put her down! However I did notice she was so sleepy and something was not quite right. I took her to a few vets, they ran tests and told me she was fine except, she couldn’t have been more than 4-5 weeks old. The breeder said she was 8 weeks. Charlotte started to loose hair behind her ears, and slowly on her belly and face- she was turning into a gremlin!
I developed a red sore over my heart that I had swabbed and cultured. Found out it was a very slow developing ringworm. Over the next three months, we had to quarantine her in a corner of the house, bathe her, shave her, only hold her wrapped in a towel and throw away the towel.
Wrapped like a burrito in a towel I would sneak her into the bedroom and she’d sleep next to me each night. I would put her back in her little pen in the morning before my ex would wake up! We finally got her cured!!!!
She continued to go everywhere with me, even to work. She was such an easy going little cat that followed me everywhere. She knew her spot at night which was being lovingly spooned in my arms. Although strictly an indoor cat, she constantly relaxed on the balcony with city views. She went to the best vet in town, and soon I got her a little sister named Possum. Possum’s a smokey Scottish fold.
Even though they loved each, it was obvious Charlotte was very territorial when it came to me. She claimed her spot in bed every night and possum was allowed to have the backs of my legs or my knee caps. This type of love went on for 4 years, along with a special pram to take the girls to the park where they could run in the grass, play at the beach, poop in the sand! ( they loved this!) She had a very relaxed life. She slept in as long as she wished, had exactly the chicken flavoured biscuits she loved. I couldn’t wait to get home every night just to hold them both and breathe them in.
A few months months ago possum accidentally clawed Charlotte in the eye and cut her eye lid. I took her to the after hours vet and while working through her eye problem, he noticed she had a heart murmur. I didn’t think too much about it as I also have a heart murmur with little effect.
The following day their regular vet, called me to bring Charlotte in for an examination. They confirmed the murmur and scheduled her in for an EKG, and I was told she had cardio myopathy(heart disease).
The condition was as advanced as if she was a 15 year old cat, but Charlotte was only 5. Charlotte was given some medication and we monitored her once a month. The Vet told me not to be surprised if she died within 6 months, but could last 5 years with proper management. It was extremely hard to grasp the severity, given she acted normally in every other aspect according to me.
On 5/6/2016 about 10pm she was breathing at a rate of 45 breaths per minute and then 60 to 74 breaths.. I looked it up and found that 25 is the normal range. Her accelerated breathing made it look like she had been running around, but she hadn’t she was at rest. Other than her accelerated breathing, she looked fine.
I took her into SASH small animal surgery hospital at midnight, where they immediately put her in a hyperbaric oxygen chamber to slow her breathing down to a comfortable rate. I stared at her through the perspex glass and noticed her eyes were glossy, like she was crying. I felt positive even though I had signed a full resuscitation consent form, which I thought was just standard procedure. The vet then informed me of how serious the situation was now. I began balling my eyes out, and begged God to heal her heart, or give her mine.
My partner and I arrived back home and within 30 minutes, we were called and told to come back as she had started to deteriorate. (Evidently when the nurse removed her to take X Ray lots of fluid came out of her little mouth and she went blue) as her lungs were full of fluid. Thank god for full resuscitation.
We arrived back in 20 minutes and they had her on the table covered with wires, and she was sedated. We then agreed to put her on the ventilator to help her breathe.
We got a hotel close by around 5am after spending an hour outside in the car trying to sleep. Went back in hospital at 9am where she was stable as long as on the ventilator. I knew there was no cure for the heart disease she had, so this episode would repeat again and again. I asked at least ten time’s to explain to me again what would happen if I were to take her home. I was having trouble getting my head around the reality of the situation. The Vet told me she would suffocate to death, so I really didn’t have a choice. All these things rushing through my head were thoughts of prolonging her pain and exposing her to suffering for my selfish needs. Something she’d never experienced before. I walked back into the operating room, bent over her body hooked up to wires and the ventilator, beeping gadgets and IV bags, electrodes and clampy things with stickers on her. I gently put my head down next to hers, whispered and cried. She immediately fluttered her left ear on my lips, and opened her left eye, as if to let me know she knew I was there.
The nurse gave her more sedative to relax her, and I went back into the room where the big brown sofa was. They soon wheeled charlotte in, not connected to anything this time but the Vet was assisting her breathing with a device. They put charlotte on my lap, where I picked her up like I have always done and placed her in my arms in the position she loves, like a baby in my right arm. I kissed her so many times and gave the Vet the heart wrenching signal.
At 11:00am still holding her sedated little warm body in my arms, they euthanised my baby girl. Her heart beat was gone within seconds. I cried and held her like you wouldn’t believe. Vince was by my side the entire time. When I finally laid her back on the table, she was wet with my tears.
It’s such a loss. A life cut way too short.
There were clues in her actions now looking back in the past two months, that she knew what was to come. She was letting possum sleep next to her which was very close to me at night. I’d wake up with them both spooned next to me in my arms. Charlotte even left twice in the morning, leaving me to wake up to possum in her place. I would find Charlotte on the guest bed, which was out of character for her. She would always stay extra close at night, or at least until I fell asleep. It has has been 2 weeks to the day since her passing.
If I could have one more day with her, there’s nothing I wouldn’t give.
I get tormented by memories that keep coming. I went to work in double bay the other day, seeing all the spots I’d take her, the things we would do were right there in my face. So many things. Like I’d take her to the yacht club, to the park, to see the Christmas tree with Santa. The toy store where she would sit up in her pram and stare through the window at intricate baby toys inside. Although it was a ‘real baby store’, the hanging airplanes and hot aired balloons inside would fascinate Charlotte and possum every time. They would press their paws and nose’s against the window in amazement. When Charlotte came to my clinic – it was her home, she knew where it was on our walks! I felt she had helped me build this clinic for the last 5 years -wearing her adorable tutu!
Time will heal. – another day,another way. Only broke down 6 times, that’s 3 less than yesterday.
Possum is finding herself and taking on the role of being number #1. She’s adapting well even though I know she’s hurting and missing Charlotte like me . She still sits by the front door and peers out the windows. We are giving her lots of attention but I hear her whimpering in her sleep. She carefully searches the house for Charlotte. Finally sat on her chair in the sun on the balcony. I can only imagine what she is feeling. She’s missing Charlotte very bad, she’s never known life without her by her side.
Last Tuesday I delivered three dozen white tulips arranged with magnolia leafs to the animal hospital., and in return they handed me Charlottes tiny urn. Needless to say I nearly lost my legs, and I cried so much it took me 30 minutes to leave the parking lot. That night I slept with the urn in my arms, and felt her close to me.
My partner wasn’t impressed. He told me to get it out of bed.
I held onto it so tight and cried myself to sleep and he left me alone.
It was a freezing cold ceramic sealed urn. All I could think of was keeping it warm. That night I had a magical dream.
” I was having tea in heaven with people wearing white. Familiar people – I can’t say who they are, I don’t think I even knew, yet they were familiar to me. There was a huge White House with pillars to my right. The sun was setting, it made a back drop lighting up the ever so large trees, they glowed golden with the sun rays behind them, cherry blossoms and hydrangeas were massive in bunches in the trees. It was like a story book or fairy tale. It was warm and beautiful. I didn’t see Charlotte but I remember seeing other animals. The wind was soft, like the way it would make the whispy hair’s behind Charlottes ears blow. Oh how I loved watching her eyes turn so blue in the sun, watching her white fur blow like soft feathers in the gentle wind…”
Now thinking of it-
Perhaps it was a vision of what charlotte was seeing. Letting me know she’s with familiar people in a lovely place. A gorgeous place.
It still makes me feel sad as I know she’d be missing me.
She’s left not only her paw print on my heart but that initial sore I had from her ringworm 5 years ago is “hypo pigmented” over my heart in the shape of a heart ironically. It’s like god switched our hearts. Mine now aches while hers I hope is restored.
She was here to teach me gentleness, kindness and so much patience. Responsibility and how to gently nurture. She was my amazing evening every night, and good morning everyday. She was always there to greet me, take kisses and keep me warm. I never left without kissing them both. NEVER. ALWAYS kissed them first thing in the morning. I KNEW one day I’d loose one or bot. I knew this and knew I could never take them for granted, as this time would eventually come. Never did I expect it so soon. I prayed for at least 10 more years with both of them.
Charlotte was my everything.
Forever in my heart.
RIP Charlotte. I pray she will come back to me. I know its a big sacrifice to leave heaven and return to this world.
If I can just be selfish – just this one time!
If you need help getting over your grief and want to connect with one of your animal loved ones on the other side make a booking http://www.animaltalk.com.au/portfolio/grief-counselling/